Why Can’t I Shut Up about the New Pope?
This just in: New Pope Gives God the Finger.
I dunno, is his intent for us to feel sympathy for him? I’m sure being pope is a pain in the ass (especially for a guy well beyond the retirement age) but surely it’s better than lots of other jobs—and hardly akin to a beheading. C’mon, Benedict! Suck it up!
(Though I must say, he sure does have that whole “papal hand gestures” thing down already. Kudos to him!)
in Last Friday’s Entry
In the cantina scene with the flawless Bea Arthur, there was a guy with a hole in the top of his skull, and that’s where he poured all his drinks. It was supposed to be played for laughs I guess (he was played by Harvey Korman, after all), but watching it as a 5-year-old I was traumatized in ways I don’t even want to recount here. Suffice it to say that, among other problems, I had nightmares on the theme of cranium holes for years afterwards. What a fucked-up thing to put in a show aimed at kids....
This doesn’t have anything to do with the Holiday Special specifically, but when I was younger I thought that “the Force” was Star Wars-speak for “gravity.” I think this erroneous assumption sprang from Obi-Wan Kenobi’s initial description of the Force: “It's an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us. It binds the galaxy together.” Needless to say, I was not into Eastern philosophy as a kid. (But apparently I knew a shitload about physics.)
Last night I saw this “hipster” kid on campus wearing a pair of cardboard 3-D glasses. Two things went through my head. First, what a dumbass! Second, remember how Billy Zane wore 3-D glasses in Back to the Future? They didn’t look cool on him either—but that was kind of the point, which brings me back to my first thought: what a dumbass! Here’s a tip for all the self-consciously “cool” folks out there: if something makes Billy Zane look like an idiot, chances are you won’t have much more success with it yourself.
I think I’m in love with the girl in that Volkswagen Jetta commercial. You know, the one who pisses off her grumpy downstairs neighbor by dancing around in her apartment? When I mentioned this to someone (who shall remain nameless) earlier today, he said she looks like Ashlee Simpson.
I made him take it back.
I don’t particularly care for Gwen Stefani’s music, but I could watch her videos aaallllll day long. Well, except for the one where she and Eve pretend they’re pirates. That one's just ridiculous.
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