But as I was sitting at a stoplight last night, still fuming about my lame-ass superpowers (I would’ve started calling myself Repulsor Man if my inability to pick up static-charged objects had continued), I noticed an old couple--probably in their 70s or 80s--sitting in the car behind me. What had caught my eye in the rear-view mirror was the man tucking a white blanket around his wife, who was the one in the driver’s seat. She was obviously cold, and he was doing everything he could to make sure she was comfortable on their drive home. It was just about the sweetest, most touching thing I’d ever seen. So my mood improved greatly after that.
When I got home I watched one of my favorite movies, High Fidelity. Ever since Sixteen Candles I’ve considered John Cusack to be one of my personal heroes. Though I wouldn’t consider him my “favorite” actor, he has starred in (and even taken part in writing a few of) some of the best movies ever: Sixteen Candles, Better Off Dead, One Crazy Summer, Say Anything..., The Grifters, Bullets Over Broadway, Grosse Pointe Blank, Being John Malkovich, and the aforementioned High Fidelity. He’s the kind of actor I think I’d like to hang out in a bar with, because he’d be interesting to talk to--and not just about movies.
Anyway, one of the highlights of High Fidelity (aside from John Cusack, Joan Cusack’s classic line, “You’re a fucking asshole!,” and Jack fucking Black, the most ridonculous [his word] film comedian since Jim Carrey circa 1994) is the top five lists. I love lists. Especially “favorites” lists. They’re fun. So when I was watching the movie last night I said to myself, “I should come up with my own answers to these questions.” And since I had nothing better to do with my time, that’s what I did.
Now, obviously I didn’t come up with the top five things I miss about Laura, because that would just be stupid. And although I do have a top five break-ups list this entry isn’t about me weeping into cyberspace, so it’s been nixed. Nor did I come up with a list for Barry’s “Top five musical crimes perpetrated by Stevie Wonder in the ‘80s and ‘90s” because it’s not a question that’s meant to be answered (and because I can’t even think of any songs, other than “I Just Called to Say I Love You,” that he wrote in the ‘80s and ‘90s--though I’m sure many of them were none too good).
Now that I’ve bored you with the ground rules, here we go....
Top 5 Records to Listen to on a Monday Morning:
- Axis: Bold as Love, The Jimi Hendrix Experience
- Orbvs Terrarvm, Orb
- Vespertine, Björk
- Dear John Coltrane, Vanessa Daou
- Life, The Cardigans
Top 5 Side Ones Track Ones:
- ”Immigrant Song” (Led Zeppelin III, Led Zeppelin)
- ”Big Exit” (Stories from the City, Stories from the Sea, P.J. Harvey)
- ”Gimme Shelter” (Let It Bleed, The Rolling Stones)
- ”Angel” (Mezzanine, Massive Attack)
- ”Move Any Mountain” (En-Tact, Shamen)
Top 5 Dream Jobs:
- astronomer
- professor of English literature at Wellesley (like my man Nabokov)
- president of LucasArts, Ltd. (adios, George!)
- movie columnist for the New Yorker
- professional lottery winner
Top 5 Songs about Death:
- ”Lucky Man” (Emerson, Lake, and Palmer)
- ”Gallows Pole” (Led Zeppelin)
- ”Sunday Bloody Sunday” (U2)
- ”Sometimes It Snows in April” (Prince)
- ”Watching TV” (Roger Waters)
Top 5 Songs at My Funeral:
- ”Comin’ Back to Me” (Jefferson Airplane)
- ”Sunday, Part II” (Cibo Matto)
- ”Invisible Sun” (The Police)
- ”Home” (Depeche Mode)
- ”It Was a Very Good Year” (Frank Sinatra)
[By the way, I realize High Fidelity was based on a novel by Nick Hornby, and I’ve heard it’s pretty good. But I have this thing about mixing books and movies. If I love a book (such as Nineteen Eighty-Four) then I refuse to see the movie. Similarly, if I love a movie (such as Fight Club, The Ninth Gate, The Beach) and I haven’t read the book already, I usually never do. As often as seeing a movie that’s based on a book I love has backfired (e.g., The Time Machine—twice over), the same thing has happened when I read a book that was the basis for a movie I love (e.g., The Dumas Club, on which The Ninth Gate was based, was a thoroughly disappointing book). So I’ll probably never read High Fidelity. Unless someone tells me I must read it (although that’s how I got roped into reading The Dumas Club).]
So there you go. If you get inspired to come up with your own top fives, I hope you’ll share them with me. Because if it’s one thing I like more than making lists, it’s reading lists that other people made. Spread the love, people.
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